Search This Blog

Translate

Friday, January 31, 2014

ENGLISH LESSON.


Lady 2 Dr.: Mera beta motor cycle se gir gaya.

Dr:I don't know Hindi talk in English.

Sir,I no speak eng.

Dr.Try pls.

Lady:My londa gironda from hero Honda....

Think different !



An Old Man's T-Shirt Quote:




"I m Not 50...... 




I m 16 With 34 Years Of Experience..." 




Think different ! 




THINK POSITIVE

Dare to Kiss..





Definition of "Nothing"



Time doesn't wait for you or me,

Days pass and years change, You miss your frnds,

You move away from your close ones,

Your life changes, friends change, people change, but your heart have those precious moments engraved in it...They are always there...You sit back, think about those happy days and smile and when somebody asks you the reason for your smile, You just say...

NOTHING...

Atleast give one call..



Boy ki engagement ek bohut Khubsurat Ladki se fix hui..




Woh dono pure din rat whatsap se baat kiya karte rehte the.




Akhir vo raat aahi gaii.. ush raat ladka, ladki ka ghoonghat uthaakar bola..




Tum wakai hi bahut khubsurat ho… 




Tumhe kya gift karu.




Ladki sharmati hui boli….


“Do aap taa Dill Tale….”.



MORAL: Kam se kam ek call toh kar lena chahiye tha, 


Bus dekh liya whats up ka natija.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Bengali Babu went to learn Shayari..



Once, a Bengali Babu went to Gulzar Sahib to learn Shayari..


Gulzar Sahib asked the Bengali babu to repeat after him:


"Na Gila Karunga,

Na Shikwa Karunga... 

Tu Salaamat Rahe is duniya me ,

Rab Se Yahi Dua Karunga."




The Bengali Babu repeated:




"Na Geela Korega,

Na Sukha Korega.... 

Tum Saala, Mat Raho is Duniya me , 

Rob Se Yehi Dua Korega"




Gulzar saheb fainted !!!

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Mera haath pakad lo...



Ek chhoti bacchi apne Papa ke saath ja rahi thi.

1 Pul par Paani bahut tezi se bah raha tha.

Papa : Beta daro mat,

Mera haath pakad lo.

Bacchi : Nahi Papa Aap Mera haath pakad lo.

Papa (Muskura kar bole) :

Dono me kya Antar hai?

Bacchi : Agar main Aapka haath pakdu aur achanak kuch ho jaaye to shayad,

Me Aapka haath chhod du.

LEKIN agar Aap Mera haath pakdenge to,

Main janti hu ke chahe kuch bhi ho jaaye.

“AAP MERA HAATH KABHI NAHI CHHODENGE”

GREAT LOVE.

“Aaj bhi Bacche haath chhod dete hai,

Maa-Baap nahi”

Luv Ur Parents..

Dedicated to our “PARENT’S”.

Monday, January 27, 2014

I know at least 13 things about you now..



I know at least 13 things about you now:




1. You are holding your phone




2. You are on what's up. 




3. You just opened my msg. 




4. You are now reading it  




5. You are human 




7. You can't say the letter "P" without separating your lips 




8. You just attempted to do it 




9. You are laughing at yourself 




10. You have smiles on your face 




11. You skipped No.6 




12. You just checked to see if there is a No.6 




13. You are laughing at this because I caught you..




Hahaha is it true? :)




If u smiled then forward it to ur friends to put a smile on their faces too



 

Sunday, January 26, 2014

chhutti chahiye...



Santa-Sir, meri patni mere saath baahar jaana chahti hai chhutti chahiye.




Boss-Nahin milegi.




Santa-Shukriya sir, jaanta tha musibat ke waqt aap hi kaam aayenge!

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Call Duration..


Boy to Boy !

00:00:59




Boy to Mom !! 

00:00:50 




Boy to Dad !

00:00:30 




Boy to Girl !

01:23:59 




Girl to Girl !

05:29:59 




Girl to Boy !

miss call 


Wife to Husband!

dissconnected 




Husband to Wife!




call waiting!!




BOY- I Love you my Jaan..



BOY- I Love you my Jaan, come in my life & stay in my heart...!




GIRL - Sandal nikaalun kya?




BOY - Hat pagli! Mera dil koi MANDIR thodi hai, bindaas pehan kar aajaa

Friday, January 24, 2014

Sexy Secretary..



Sexy secretary comes angrily out of Boss cabin..




Staff asked: What happened?




Secretary: He asked are you free tonight?




I said yes . .









&#@#rd gave me



 60 pages to type..

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Zindagi ke 8 Hisse hote hain..





Zindagi ke 8 Hisse 
hote hain




1. Padhai





2. Khel





3. Mauj Masti







4. Pyar








5. Shaadi













6.



















7.









8.
















Kya dhoond rahe ho..???







Shadi hone ke baad sab Khatam....




Wednesday, January 22, 2014

She is hot!!!!



She is hot !




She is sweet !




She always Needs A lip 4 kiss




Whole world is Mad 4 her !





Who? Who is she?









Do you know?




Answer=Tea




Chai piyo Mast jio … Good morning !!!


Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Eye makeup





Painting on the Road..












I am back... Santa Singh



Doctor: Aapki Biwi ab sirf do dino ki mehman hai. I'm so sorry... 

Santa: Isme sorry ki kya baat hai Dr. Saab. Nikaal lenge ye do din bhi jaise-taise...

-------------------------

Ek Sardarni behosh ho gayi...

Doctor: Yeh mar gayi hai..

Jab usko jalane lage to woh uth baithi aur boli mein zinda hoon...!!

Sardar: Chupchap padi reh gawar, tu Doctor se zyada jaanti hai kya?

Jalao ji Jalao...

------------------------

Santa: Agar operation ke dauran mujhe kuch ho jaye to usi doctor se shaadi kar lena... 

Biwi: Aisa Q kehte ho ji? 

Santa: To kya doctor ko maaf kar doon?? 

------------------------

Sardar ne apni sagaai tod di...

Kyonki,

Ladki kunwari thi...

Sardar bola: Jo aaj tak kisi ki nahi hui, wo meri kya hogi...

Monday, January 20, 2014

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine..



To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine..




Ben said: ‘In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.’




In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in faeces.




In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.




However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.




Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health.







Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.




There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.

TV Anchor Charwahe se..



TV Anchor Charwahe se:

Aap Bakre ko kya khilate hain?




Charwaha: Kale ko ya Safaid ko?




Anchor: Safaid ko




Charwaha: Ghass




Anchor: Aur Kale ko?




Charwaha: Use bhi Ghass




Anchor: Inhain bandhte kidher ho?




Charwaha: Kise Kale ko ya Safaid ko?




Anchor: Safaid ko




Charwaha: Bahar ke kamre mein




Anchor: Aur Kale ko?




Charwaha: Use bhi bahar ke kamre mein




Anchor: Aur nehlate kaise ho?




Charwaha: Kise Kale ko ya Safaid ko?




Anchor: Kale ko




Charwaha: Pani se




Anchor: Aur Safaid ko?




Charwaha: Use bhi pani se




Anchor Ghusse se:

Manhos admi jab dono ke saath ek jaisa karta hai tou mujhse bar bar puchta kyu hai Kala ya Safaid...




Charwaha: Kyu ke Safaid bakra mera hai




Anchor: Aur kala?




Charwaha: Woh bhi mera hai...

7 Complicated facts about Women!!




7 Complicated facts about Women:




1. They believe in saving.




2. Believe in saving but buy expensive clothes.




3. Buy expensive clothes but never have anything 2 wear.




4. Never have anything 2 wear, but always dressed beautifully.




5. Always dressed beautifully, but never satisfied.




6. Never satisfied, but still expect men to compliment them.




7. Expect men to compliment, but don't believe them if complimented.




Extremely Complicated!!!

Blog Archive

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...