Thursday, October 18, 2012
Friday, October 12, 2012
Friday, September 21, 2012
A 54 yr old woman had a heart attack & was taken 2 the hospital.
While on d operating table she had a near death experience.
Seeing God she asked Is my time up? God said No you have another 34 yrs 2 live.
Upon recovery, d woman decided 2 stay in d hospital & hv a face-lift, liposuction, & tummy tuck. She even changed her hair color Finally she was released from the hospital.
While crossing d road on her way home, she was killed by a truck.
Arriving in front of God, she asked, You said I had another 34 years 2 live.
Why didn't you save me from d truck?
(You'll love this)
"I didn't recognize you!=)) :D
Labels: ωσмєη ωιℓℓ вє ωσмєη
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
My dear new family,
I thank u for welcoming me in my new house...
Firstly I must tell u dat my presence here should not change ur life routines.
Those who used to do the laundry must keep on doing it...
Those cooking must keep cooking...
Those cleaning must keep cleaning...
I'll not-disturb any body's routine...
So far as I'm concerned,
I'm here only to eat BUN, have FUN & entertain your SON.. !";):p
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Boss : There r 50 bricks on an airplane. If u drop 1 outside. Hw many r left?
Employee : That's easy,49.
Boss : What r d 3 steps to put an elephant into a fridge?
Employee : Open the fridge. Put the elephant in. Close the fridge
Boss : What r the four steps to put a deer
into the fridge?
Employee : Open the fridge. Take the elephant out. Put the deer in.
Close the fridge.
Boss : It's lion's birthday, all animals r there except one, why?
Employee : Because the deer is in the fridge.
Boss : How does an old woman cross a swamp
filled with crocodiles?
Employee : She jst crosses it bcz d crocodiles r at d lion's birthday
Boss : Last question.
In the end the old lady still died. Why?
Employee : Er....I guess she drowned?
Boss : No! She was hit by the brick fallen from the airplane.
U may leave nw..
Moral: Jitna marzi prepare karlo. Agar boss ne tumhari leni hai to leke hi manega :D
Labels: Agar boss ne tumhari leni hai
Monday, September 17, 2012
Labels: Horror story in 1 sentence
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Gal calls a boy :
Girl: Hello baby
Boy: Ohh janu bolo
Girl: Kahan ho yar subah se koi
ata pata nahi!
Boy: Are hum to khoye hue hain
aapki aankhon me..
Girl: Abhi kya kar rahe ho?
Boy: tumhari pic dekh raha hun,
kahin aur man hi nahi lag raha..
Girl: Maine to tumhe koi pic di hi
Boy: Are mere dil me chapi hai
Girl: But hum to parson hi mile
Boy: Tumhare bina har ek pal
barson hai Pinky......
Girl: Pinky??!! Ye pinky kaun hai ??
main to nisha hun!!
Boy: Tumse bat karke mai to sab
bhul jata hun..
Girl: Tum prashant ho na??
Boy: Gharwale to aseem bulate
hain, lekin wo galat ho sakte hain
Girl: Ye 998XXXXXX hai na??
Boy: Ab tak nahi tha par ab se
Labels: Height of Flirting
Friday, September 14, 2012
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
A man buys a lie detector robot which slaps people who lie. He decides 2 test it @ dinner.
Dad: Son, where were u today during school hours?
SON: at School. Robot slaps son!
Ok,I lied, I went to the movies.
DAD: Which one?
SON: Toy Story. Robot slaps son again!
Ok, it was Bedroom Eyes.
DAD: What?! When I was ur age,I didn't even know what films were.. Robot slaps Dad!
MOM: Ha ha! After all he's ur son. Robot slaps mom...!
Labels: lie detector
Monday, September 10, 2012
If animals and insects have BBM, these are most likely to be their Status Updates :
COCKROACH: "Managed to skip from some one’s foot step.. Man, I lead a dangerous lifestyle!
Cat: "My 7th child is asking who is her dad. What shall I tell her??,I don’t even remember"....
Mosquito: "I am HIV positive.. this is all due to wrong sucking"
Pig: "Oh gosh they throw the gossips that I am spreading flu…WTF!!
Goat : "Friends, don’t go out, Eid is coming soon..
Chicken: "If tomorrow there's no status update from my side, means I'm being served at KFC.
Love you all "
Labels: BBM status
Saturday, September 08, 2012
Gabbar:- Kitne Admi the?
Sambha:- Sarkar 2.
Gabbar:- Mujhe ginti nahi ati, 2 kitne hote he??
Smb:- 2 1 ke Baad ata he.
Gab:- aur 2 k pehle??
Smb:- 2 k pehle 1 ata he.
Gabbr:- To bich me kaun ata he?
Samb:- Bichme koi nahi ata.
Gab:- To fir Dono ek sath Q nahi ate?
Smb:- 2 1 k bad hi aa sakta he Qki 2 1 se bada he
Gab:- 2 1 se Kitna bada he?
Samba:- abe oye goli marni h to mar de, tera namak khaya hai, chavananprash nahi :-))
Labels: Gabbar and Sambha Joke
Friday, September 07, 2012
Lady on telephone:
Hello Sir, I want to meet & talk to you..
Man: do u know me..
Lady: Yes you are the father of one of my kids.
Oh my God!
Are u Nisha?
Lady in confusion...
No sir i'm the class teacher of your son.. .
Thursday, September 06, 2012
Interviewer: Let me check ur English, tell me d opposite of good.?
Interviewer: Shut Up.
Banta: Keep talking.
Interviewer: Ok, now stop all dis.
Banta: Ok, now carry on all dis.
Interviewer: Abey, chup ho ja..chup ho ja..chup ho jaa.
Banta: Abey bolta ja..bolta ja..bolta ja.
Interviewer: Arey, yaar.
Banta: Arey dushman.
Interviewer: Get Out.
Banta: Come In.
Interviewer: Oh my God.
Banta: Oh, my devil.
Interviewer: mere bap chup hoja
banta: mere bete bolta reh
Interviewer: U are rejected.
Banta: I m selected. Bolo ta ra ra ra ra.=)) =D
Labels: Funny interview with Santa
Wednesday, September 05, 2012
Monday, September 03, 2012
Man discovered COLORS and invented PAINT..
Woman got inspired from PAINT and invented MAKEUP..
Man discovered WORD and invented CONVERSATION..
Woman got inspired from CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP..
Man discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD...
Woman got inspired from FOOD and invented DIET....
Man discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE....
Woman got inspired from LOVE and invented LOVE TRIANGLES.
Man discovered TRADING and invented MONEY...
Woman got MONEY and started SHOPPING...
Thereafter, man has discovered and invented a lot of things... WHILE WOMEN ARE STILL SHOPPING.
Labels: WOMEN ARE STILL SHOPPING
Friday, August 31, 2012
A Woodcutter Loses his Axe (Kulhaadi) & Lord Offers him Both Gold & Silver
but He takes his Own Axe & Seeing his Honesty Lord gives him All 3.
but He takes his Own Axe & Seeing his Honesty Lord gives him All 3.
Lord brings Out Angelina Jolie & Asked 'Is this ur Wife'
He Replied - Yes.!
Lord said 'U Lied n u r gona b Punished'
He Said 'wait Lord I Lied bcoz if I had Said No, u Would have taken out Cameron Diaz.
If Then I said no, u Would have taken Out My Wife n Seeing my Honesty, U Wud hve Given me All 3.
Bt I m a Poor Man, I Can't keep All 3. So I said Yes to Angelina.
God: rulayega kya pagle...ja le ja isse...
Labels: Honest Liars
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Santa and Banta were playing chess (joke doesn't end here).:D
Santa: Chal yaar bas karte hain, pak raha hai.
Banta: Haan yaar, waise bhi tera sirf haathi bacha hai aur mera sirf ghoda.:O :p
The joke doesn't end here either..:D
Phir waha Vishy aata hai.
Vishy: Chalo Santa-Banta, chess khelate hai.
Santa-Banta: Nahi, aap to hume aasani se hara doge.
Vishy: Chalo yaar. Tum dono aur me akela.
S-B: Phir bhi hum haar jayenge
Vishy: Okay, mai left hand se khelunga.
S-B: Haan. Phir thik hai.:p
The joke still doesn't end...:D
Dono obviously haar jate hai aur Vishy chala jata hai.
Santa: Badi sharmanaak baat hai, yaar.
Left hand se bhi hara diya usne.
Banta: Abe bewkoof bana gaya woh hume.
Banta: Saala lefty hi hoga...:)
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
1. They believe in saving.
2. Still they go out & buy expensive clothes.
3. Always buy expensive clothes but never have anything 2 wear.
4. Never have anything 2 wear, but always dressed beautifully.
5. Always dressed beautifully, but never satisfied.
6. Never satisfied, but still expect men to compliment them.
7. Expect men to compliment, but don't believe them if complemented.
Sunday, April 01, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
- ► 2015 (529)
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- ▼ Oct 2012 (4)
- ωσмєη ωιℓℓ вє ωσмєη...
- How to kill a woman without any weapon?
- Wedding speech from girl to her in laws:
- Agar boss ne tumhari leni hai....
- Horror story in 1 sentence..
- :::: Height of Flirting ::::
- Jahan Matlab - wahan Dosti kahan
- Why you cry again for same reason....
- World in your feet!!!
- Lie Detector
- BBM status!!
- Gabbar and Sambha Joke
- Rocking question...shocking answer...
- Funny interview with Santa!
- Height of MISUNDERSTANDING
- What do you call couples after few years of marria...
- WOMEN ARE STILL SHOPPING...
- ► 2011 (83)